My Back Pages

1:35PM - The sincerest form of flattery

A few years ago, BBC Two's Top Gear showed this on their programme: http://www.topgear.com/uk/videos/tiny-apeel

About a year later, CBS Sunday Morning brought us this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jp6JalC5yH0

Hmmm...

9:48PM

Today I received this form with my newspaper:



I wrote the following on the back of the form (along with my address and my signature) and shall send it back to them as such:



2L with the Gleaner!

9:59PM - O______O;;;;

http://comments.deviantart.com/5/27120093/1196677802

"What really bothers me about the media is that they still talk about Michael Jackson, but they've forgotten about Billy Mays. I think Billy Mays contributed a lot more to the world. His infomercials influenced me to write."

I am too tired to comment on this right now, but I want to remember to comment on it when I am not tired, so this is just a reminder.

I am reminded of a statement, reportedly made by a British policeman, that Princess Diana was so much greater than Winston Churchill...

8:22PM - 42

( The answer to everything. )

6:44PM - Ah, memories.

This afternoon, as I was trying to clear my room a little more, I came across some correspondence from early 2003 that I really want to keep. It is a reminder as to part of the reason why Jamaica will not prosper, and it is a reminder as to why I have written off the existence of a particular individual.

The acting department head at the time, whom I shall call Mr. R. had circulated a copy of the minutes of the latest department meeting, which had been taken by another member of staff, whom I shall call Ms. W. Upon reading through the minutes, I replied to Mr. R. and Ms. W. with ten queries.Three or four of these queries were related to grammar, three were related to the contents of the minutes being at odds with my recollection, two or three were related to general paragraph structure and formatting, and one was related to the specific format of the minutes.

The reply from Ms. W. was as follows, verbatim but for the deletion of my name:

Mr. (my name):

I am not a professional Secretary, but rather an aspiring Engineer therefore it is no coincidence that my secretarial skills are not well developed. You on the other hand seem quite knowledgeable about this area so it might be a good idea for you to assume the duties of the Recording Secretary at subsequent meetings especially since your work load is not sufficient to keep you busy.

So here is this "aspiring Engineer" who has no interest in keeping the record straight, has no interest in proper presentation, and responds to valid, objective correction with insultive insinuations. The ethic of "anything worth doing is worth doing well" is lost on most of Jamaica, and very specifically so on Miss W.

For the record, I "seem quite knowledgeable about this area" because I had been the technical secretary on a committee whose minutes were part of a record reviewed by a government ministry, that had to give precise records, and that, quite often, did not have a recording secretary on hand. It was therefore often put unto me to write the minutes for those meetings in order to keep the record straight. and, as such, I gave it my all. I wonder what Miss W., the "aspiring Engineer" would have done in those circumstances?

With all respect I had for that individual completely evaporated, I replied as follows:

Ms. W:

I take it, therefore, that you do not aspire to know English, as most of the suggestions have to do with the proper use of our official language. Good luck with your continued ignorance.

Ms. W. left the organization within a year, if I remember correctly. Good riddance. I hope she eventually finds herself unemployable and starves to death.

6:00PM

So I wandered back here for old time's sake, and looked at the first twenty journal entries on my "friends" page. By far the most of them are from roll_soul and all but one of the rest are from alovelyhaunting, both of whom have explicitly stated that they want nothing further to do with me. So it goes.

The one that was from neither of these was from rayof_sunshine. She hasn't yet chased me away, but the acquaintance is dormant right now and it would probably be best if I have something of interest to say before I try to revive it.

However, just because someone finds me to be repugnant doesn't mean I can't steal a meme from him or (as in this instance) her, so here goes...

Stolen from roll_soul:

Rules:
1. Write down every letter of your name.
2. Then type a song that pops up in your mind in each letter of your name as the first letter.
3. Count the letters of your name, and tag people you know in that number.

S - Sunday Morning Coming Down - Kris Kristofferson
A - A Most Peculiar Man - Simon & Garfunkel
M - Memory - Barbra Streisand
B - Born on the Bayou - Creedence Clearwater Revival
L - Legalize It - Peter Tosh
O - Over There - George M. Cohan
B - Be - Neil Diamond

( Lyrics to 'Be' )

Termites gone from the house; next is to replace the fascia and the ceiling bed. And to finish rearranging my room so that everything will fit in it again.

9:47PM - Jamaica Public Disservice Company strikes again!

I woke up early this morning, ate breakfast, watched Hot Rod TV and Gearz on SPEED Channel, and then went back to bed.

I woke up again at about 8:50 am to find my radio's clock flashing at 08:22 am, indicating that power had gone. While I was setting the clock, the power went again. I called the power company and heard that there was scheduled maintenance going on and that power would be back at 5 pm. Oh, joy.

I did some shopping, ate some food, went for a drive to the airport, and had a nap. I woke up at about half past four and stayed in bed waiting for the power until about 5:45 pm when I called the power company again. I then heard that there were delays and the power would come back at 7 pm.

I called them again at 7:30 pm to hear that they were wrapping up and power would come back at 7:45 pm.

I called them again at 8:15 pm to hear that it would come back at 8:30 pm.

Amazingly enough, power came back at 8:30 pm... and went again at 9:00 pm.

Power came back again at about 9:45 pm, hopefully for good, although I cannot be certain.

Postscript: Power went again at about 10:10 pm, came back at about 10:20 pm

Jamaica Public Disservice Company Limited is a gigantic rass.

11:53PM - Beware the stupid and industrious!

( Quote of the day )

( Sarcasm or ignorance? Or maybe something else? )

8:52PM - TransTel television shows

Back in the 70s when I was a child, JBC Television, at the time the only television station in Jamaica, used to put on programmes by a West German television production company called TransTel. I used to watch about all of them. Probably the most heavily watched of them was the football (i.e. soccer) programme Telematch, but the others included the science programme 01, the fashion programme Eva 2000, and... I don't remember the others... ^^;

10:27AM - A different kind of propelling pencil

( Ever seen a pencil like this? )

All photos and drawings (c) the author.

7:40PM - The pride and the pain

Thursday: I paid for the van and got a cover note for it. I was told it needed ball joints.

Friday: I had the van's registration transferred to me and handed in the old title for transfer into my name.

Saturday: I took my mother up to visit her brother. The visit was appreciated by all. So was the van.

Sunday: Did nothing that involved the van.

Monday: I drove the van to work and took it to a valuator at lunch time to get a more formal assessment than the one I got on Thursday. After lunch, I called the Suzuki dealer and was told that he ball joints were part of the control arms. I drove to the dealer after work to buy the control arms. I came home in horrible traffic, stopping along the way to fill the tank, as I did not think I had enough petrol to get me home in that traffic. Less than a mile away from home, the car began behaving very strangely. First gear, which had been quite all right up until then, was suddenly very tall, and I could not move away from a standstill smoothly without a lot of clutch. By the time I got home, there was the strong smell of burning rubber.

Tuesday (today):
I left home very early to get to the mechanic without much traffic, to avoid the trouble I had yesterday. First and second still felt suspiciously like third and fourth. the garage wasn't open yet, so I parked outside, locked the van up, and walked to work, slightly less than a mile away. I informed my colleagues that I might be late, did some work, and then walked back to the van, drove it into the garage, and left the instructions, including to check the transmission for problems.

Shortly after I got back to work (early) and was settling in, I got a call from the garage to say that I needed more parts. I walked back to the garage, took the van, drove to an ATM to pay on the credit card for the parts I bought yesterday, drove to the dealer to buy the other parts they needed, and drove back to the garage with the parts. During this drive, the transmission problem was still evident, and the burning rubber smell was evident when I got back to the garage. I walked back to work.

At 4:30 pm, when my work day ends, I called the garage and was told that the car would be ready in a half-hour. I called home to tell them I was going for the car and I walked to the garage, taking a detour to an ATM to pay off the parts I bought today in case the garage bill would have been close to my limit.

The bill from the garage was huge, but not as much as the combined cost of the parts I had bought at the dealer. However, when I left the garage, the transmission, which had been serviced but not repaired, was just as bad as before. By the time I got home, it took me an eternity to go up the short incline from the road to my gate. My sister came in behind me and saw the ordeal. I must have got the real first eventually, but it took a long, long time.

I am going to take the van to the dealer to have the gearbox fixed... at the end of the month. I have gone as far as my budget will allow. I will get the documents and the validation to the insurance broker and have them set up the policy, and then I will have the van parked for a month.

10:20PM - The definitive Joe Bar comic

While looking for Joe Bar Team pictures, I came across the definitive Joe Bar Team comic. I decided to display it here.

All three links can be found at http://membres.lycos.fr/pkpbyronn/joebarteam/ , but here they are, displayed for the reader's convenience:

5:59PM - That's service for you!

The browsers on my desktop stopped working last Friday, so I switched over to the laptop and gave out the desktop the next day.

The techs finished repairing the desktop yesterday.

When I set it up and started it... the browsers didn't work.

8:13PM - The life and death of J. G. Parry Thomas

( I present to you the tragic story of a young man whose employers' actions led him to an addiction that cost him his employment and, ultimately, his life. )

7:05AM - World's Best Job! I don't qualify... :(

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20090113/od_afp/lifestyleaustraliatourismoffbeat_20090113032028

According to this article, the selected person can earn Aus$150,000 (US$105,000) in six months by:

* Being flown to Hamilton Island in the Great Barrier Reef, Australia
* Strolling the white sands
* snorkelling the reef
* taking care of "a few minor tasks", and
* reporting to a global audience via weekly blogs, photo diaries and video updates.

Qualifications - Applicant must be:

* a good swimmer,
* an excellent communicator
* able to speak and write English
* willing to talk to the media about what they're doing
* someone who loves sea, the sun, and the outdoors

Apart from the salary, the successful applicant gets:

* Free return flight from their home to Hamilton Island
* Free lodging in a three-bedroom beach home complete with plunge pool and golf buggy

Unfortunately, while I am a fairly good communicator and I speak and write English well (if I do say so myself... ^^; ), I can't swim, I don't like media exposure, I burn fairly easily, and, for someone who is going to be a spokesperson for Australian tourism, I'm not good-looking. A pity, because six months alone on an island sounds liks something I would try...

Interested? Apply at http://www.islandreefjob.com/en/ before 22 February. (The URL doesn't work right now... a portent of things to come? ^^; )

6:14PM

I was on vacation from the 2nd to the 6th.

I got the flu on the 6th.

On the night of the 6th, shortly after midnight, I woke up, drank some water, and went back to bed. As I was settling back down to sleep, my bed broke down.

So there I was, with the flu, disassembling my bed in the middle of the night. I put most of it out of the way , put the spring on the floor, put the mattress back on the spring, and eventually got back on the mattress and went to sleep.

I woke up late on the morning of the 7th (naturally) and left home without eating breakfast. I rode to Subway in Liguanea to eat breakfast there. They claim to open at seven o'clock but, at 07h20, there was a worker there outside waiting for the supervisor. The worker was still there at 07h38, when I gave up and left.

I went to the Esso station in Half-Way-Tree and got two hot dogs and a cappucino. I then went to York Pharmacy to get some Panadol Multi Symptom Non Drowsy tablets. York Pharmacy did not have any Panadol Multi Symptom tablets of any kind. They then asked if I wanted Cetamol Multi Symptom tablets, and I said yes, so they looked for that and told me they didn't have any of those either.

The only good news thus far was that my lateness landed me in the path of a friend I hadn't seen in a long time. I just hope I didn't infect her with the flu!

I arrived late for work. Even so, I left for about ten minutes to go to a pharmacy across the street to try and get some multi symptom tablets. That pharmacy opened about three or four minutes late, but they did have multi symptom tablets, and non-drowsy ones at that! Finally some success!

The day was horrible, to the extent that the next morning was spent at the doctor. I arrived at the medical centre at 09h25, gratified to see that it opened at 09h30. The medical lab there was actually open when I got there, but I was told that the doctor didn't arrive until ten o'clock. While I waited, I called a joiner, who asked me to call him back. The doctor arrived at the expected time. I was put on a three day course of antibiotics, Panadiene tablets, and a cough syrup. I got these at a pharmacy, I got some lunch at a cafe (where I called the joiner again), I got myself home and I went straight to mattress.

Friday was back to work, better, but still not good. I did not leave my house all weekend.

I was much better today, but I don't think I'm over this yet. I have not remembered to call the joiner again. I will try to remember again in the morning.

6:12PM - Writer's Block: Shops Gone By

Shakey's Pizza. I want a sub sandwich and an order of Mojos.

6:16PM - Highlights of 2008

March: Car crash; no more car.

May: Bought brand new motor scooter.

July: Had an accident with the scooter, damaged shoulder, had to wear an arm brace.

August: Wore arm brace for most of the month, relieved of it at the end of the month.

September: Started riding the scooter again at the end of the month.

October: Sent to Mexico for a meeting.

I am still carless at the end of the year.

Fortunately, I was carless when the oil prices were at their peak.

Lewis Hamilton became the youngest ever Formula One World Driver's Champion this year. The previous youngest F1 champion was Fernando Alonso. Alonso had also been the youngest driver to win a F1 championship race, but he lost that record this year to Sebastian Vettel of Scuderia Toro Rosso at the Italian Grand Prix. I love seeing Alonso being taken out of the record books. :)

Interestingly enough, before Vettel won in the STR at Italy, the last time an Italian-made Formula One car that wasn't a Ferrari won a championship race was fifty-one years earlier at the 1957 German Grand Prix. It was a Maserati 250F driven spectacularly by Juan Manuel Fangio in his last F1 racing victory. I have just realized that Fangio was not the oldest driver ever to win a F1 championship race and never was. Luigi Fagioli was 53 when he and Fangio won the 1951 French Grand Prix (drivers were allowed to share cars in those early days of F1). Fagioli was the only person born in the 19th century to win a F1 championship race.

With the New Year will start an uncertain new era. The world economy is in turmoil. General Motors, once the largest corporation in the world, is standing shakily, depending on government help to survive. This, oddly enough, is despite GM making money everywhere except in the United States. Buick sold more cars in China than it did in the US (not sure about right now, though...), Opel, Vauxhall, and Holden are thriving in their respective markets... what is GM doing right in Europe, Asia, and Australia that they are not doing in North America?

Before Dubya, there was Nixon. Nixon resigned halfway through his second term and was replaced by Gerald Ford, who was then voted out of office and replaced by James "Jimmy" Carter. Everyone had high hopes for Carter and saw him as a new beginning after the Johnson/Nixon-style duplicity. Carter, however, was a tragic failure whose ineptitude in foreign affairs exploded into the Second Gas Crisis and a massive recession in 1979-1980. I sincerely hope that history is not repeating itself and that Obama is not the next Carter.

8:53PM

Contact with most of those I knew from TVTome/LF has faded away, but between yesterday and today my contact with the founder of LF has burned out.

I often don't know when to stop when ribbing people, and I went rather too far into obnoxiousness in a thread about Minesweeper. Not completely as a result of that, but also because of the general drifting apart, I am no longer considered a friend.

I still consider LF to be an amazing feat, however.

C'est la vie.

6:06PM - No shopping

It is after 6PM on Christmas Eve and I have bought only three gifts for my immediate family so far. One has already got it and the other two have theirs in the mail. I haven't bought anything for the folks I live with yet, namely my mother and my sister. I haven't got anything for my other sister in Jamaica and her husband either.

So, you would suspect that I am getting ready to hit the shops for some last minute shopping then.

You would be wrong.

I cannot think of anything that could possibly induce me to enter that massive crush of so-called humanity at the shopping plaza, especially in the dazed, half-asleep state in which I now find myself after trying to get some rest before going. Actually, I can think of one thing, but it would not be advisable to state what it is in an open forum.

Then there is the thought of getting back with the gifts. There would be just about nowhere for me to park my scooter, so I would have to walk back home. Right. I would be relieved of my gifts and my money by a knife-wielding miscreant within one hundred meters of the plaza.

I will do my Christmas shopping on the weekend.